Tuesday, February 16, 2016

McConnell vows to present Obama from doing anything: "I'll show him how to do nothing"

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, an expert on doing nothing, will partner with President Obama to insure that nothing gets done in Washington for the next year. Rumor has it that McConnell is prepared to negotiate with the President and has put nothing on the table. Andy Borowitz (New Yorker) has the rest of the story.

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a television appearance on Sunday, the leading Senate Republican warned President Obama “in no uncertain terms” against doing anything in his remaining three hundred and forty days in office.

[snip]

While acknowledging that the President has eleven months remaining in the White House, McConnell said that he and the President “have an honest disagreement about how long eleven months is.”

“The President believes it is almost one year,” he said. “I believe it is almost zero years. I’m not a mathematician, but I believe I am right.”

As for how Obama should spend his remaining time in office, McConnell said, “If the President has trouble doing nothing, we will be more than happy to show him how it is done.”

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