Friday, August 26, 2016

RNC stops pouring money into Trump, pours martinis instead

Apparently believing that Trump does not have a shot, the RNC is investing in shots of liquor instead. Andy Borowitz at the New Yorker breaks the news.

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Calling it “the best use of our resources at this time,” the Republican National Committee has decided to pull money originally earmarked for Trump campaign ads and spend it on alcohol instead.

“With about seventy days to go until the election, we had to consider what was the optimal way for us to get through those seventy days,” [RNC Chair Reince Priebus] said. “We are confident that we have found that way.”

“It’s questionable whether the ads we were thinking of buying for Trump would work,” Harland Dorrinson, the Pennsylvania G.O.P. chairman, said. “We received the first shipment of alcohol this afternoon, and I can tell you that it’s already working.”

For more details check out Andy's report.

No comments:

Post a Comment